It’s a BABY.

What on Earth could have kept me from you for so long, beloved blerg? Well, I’ll tell you, something that I’m proud to admit is more important than onioncloute, more important, even, than Stephanie Lebow:


I’m about 6 weeks along and way flippin nauseous and acting, as so many preggers do, like the first person to have ever been pregnant.

I’m not interested in cooking really at all – preferring to spend my time shopping Rosie Pope’s, etsy, and Target Baby (registry = Ganzbow, Inc. if you’re looking) for all my newfound needs. I have found, however, that it’s really imperative to eat and that Nacho Salad (above) is easy, delicious, and totally healthy-ish! What’s more, it seems to stay down.

Seth and I have all the family support we could ever ask for. His mom, brother, and sister are super pumped, while my dad, two moms, and step dad are over the moon. Seth is being the best baby daddy a girl could want, professing love and backing it up by getting me Chik Fil A and even making tacos for me and Jon to enjoy!

In case you’ve never had the pleasure, being pregnant is WAY WEIRD. For me, it’s meant days of consuming only dill pickles (Mt. Olive, if you please) and matzoh. The nausea is really exhausting too, and apparently making a placenta takes a lot out of a lady as well, which has lead me to be utterly lazy for the past couple of weeks. Oh, and all my blood is going to Uterotown, which I’m convinced is making me stupid, despite the fact that I KILLED IT at Jeopardy last night.

I have had some good days sprinkled in the mix: Yesterday I got all cute and enjoyed a delicious Scuffletown Chicken Salad Sandwich* (and potato salad) at Garnett’s, along with a DECAF cup of coffee. I had heard of this “decaf” coffee before but never actually experienced it. Turns out, if it’s Blanchard’s, it’s still quite delicious.

A few hours later, I was scarfing up the hospitaliano at Maldini’s with Jonny D, who, in his first act as ‘Uncle Jon,’ took me to feed.

A few days before that, before Seth left for his Man-Weekend in Atlantic City, I was even able to make dinner – lemon chicken and tabouli. The bright, lemony, minty flavors of Greece and Lebanon are totally a go right now.

Unfortunately not ‘a go’ is my favorite thing to eat and one of the few things I crave right now: sushi. (Have a differing opinion? Please let me know, with as much medical evidence as available in the comments section below!)

Pretty much all of the sources I’ve considered have been pretty adamant about the stuff, so until baby pops it’s little bod out (that’s how it works, right?) I’m fishy-sushi free. I’ll still have to have some veggie maki between now and then, but that’s obviously fine. And, for the sake of transparency, I must admit, I’ll probably have a salmon roll while I’m there. Baby needs Omega3, and if pregnant women REALLY can’t have sushi, how is there still a Japan? I mean, right?

Until today, I had thought about taking a bit of a hiatus from the ol’ bloggio. I have plenty to think about without onioncloute, but I was inspired by KB (per usual,) who told me today, “you must blog about it, and make baby food, etc.” So, indeed I will.

Look forward, readers, to posts (however infrequent) on making baby food and fulfilling cravings, as soon as this Bullemic Cancer Alien lets go of the nausea knob.


*Are there pickled cherries in there, or am I trippin?


8 responses to “It’s a BABY.

  1. This is awesome. You are already, like, so the coolest mom in hystory. PS- Baby Food is the most fun thing to make ever. It’s so fun to experiment with PACKING it with nutrition and also, it’s really nice to have an audience whose first (and for the most part) only tastes of food are coming directly from YOU for, like, a really long time. His first tomato, his first pumpkin, his first mac and cheese. Oh, I’m getting super jealous of you and I’ve already done it twice! Personally, my kids have really different tastes, which presents a usually fun, sometimes arduous challenge. My kids are big eaters though, and Irene once said her favorite activity is eating. I resisted the urge to say, “Oh me, too sister” but I’m pretty sure she knows.

  2. Syreeta, that made me lol so loud I woke up the cat. I love you. Thank you for being a beautiful inspiration to meeee!

  3. OMG! I don’t know you, I do know Seth, but haven’t seen him for aaaages. BUT, am soooooo super psyched for you guys! Yay! Seth is definitely an awesome dude, and will of course be an awesome dad:) And you must be an awesome mama to be:)

    I teach child birth education classes, have 4 beauties of my own and I can honestly say….. “eat sushi!!!!!!!” THe worry behind the no raw fish thing is bacteria, so as long as you’re not eating back alley sushi, like maybe no half priced mondays at sticky rice (*do they still even do that?), but as long as you trust your source, you’ll be fine. I kept it to osaka- i couldn’t LIVE without their spicy tuna rolls for a full ten months, yes I said ten. get ready;)

    Please feel free to get in touch with me if you have any questions. This is what I do:)

    Take care! And congratulations!


    • Thanks, Melanie! I’ll take all the advice I can get (unless it’s from stuffy whitey a-holes,) so I’ll definitely be bending yr ear!

      And yes, sticky rice still has 1/2 price monday, but no one with self respect goes in sticky rice…especially not for sushi. BLORP

  4. Wait, you’re pregnant? I was so confused at maldinis, all the talk about puking and womens’ rights. I’m with you now. I gotta learn how to knit.

  5. found your blog looking for a pho recipe- you are seriously a HILARIOUS writer- bravo on an awesome blog 🙂 your writing kills me.

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